Sully
by OzGeek
Summary: On the verge of proposing, McGee is shot and Tony and Abby must use their forensic skills to track down his intended. Spoilers for Singled Out. Now complete. Chapter 5: some McAbby. Chapter 6: some Tiva.
1. Chapter 1

Tony was bored. Bored, bored, bored, bored. It was Friday afternoon and he was sitting in a car watching Ziva sit on a park bench and read a book. He should have thought of bringing a book. A book! Wow! He was bored. No, not a book; a tasteful magazine with 'interesting articles'.

He heaved a great sigh and turned his head towards McGee again. As had been the case over the past two hours, McGee was staring distractedly out the window in Ziva's general direction but his focus was not on her, it seemed a million miles away. Every now and again his lips would move like he was rehearsing something but his eyes never left the horizon.

"Plans for tonight, Probie", Tony tried again. Showing an interest in McGee's social life was a measure of just how desperate Tony was for conversation.

"Hmm?" McGee's eyes remained unmoved.

Tony leant over casually and hit him on the back of the head eliciting a rather stronger reaction than he had anticipated.

"Hey!" McGee looked straight at him for the first time since he'd stopped the engine. Why hadn't he thought of the head whack before now?

"What is wrong with you, Probie?" Tony demanded.

McGee floundered for something to say, "Ah, nothing I was just thinking…"

"You've been 'just thinking' for two hours, Probie. How can you possibly have enough thoughts to fill two hours?"

McGee looked down, embarrassed, "I've just got a lot on my mind right now," he said quietly.

"Like what?" Tony probed.

"Drop it Tony", McGee warned meeting his eyes.

"Oh come on, McGee", Tony begged, "I am so BORED! Give me something to work with here, buddy. Give me an equation to solve. Anything…" he added a few exaggerated sobs for good measure.

McGee regarded him steadily for a moment and Tony tried out a puppy dog face. McGee frowned at him and turned away.

"No", Tony gasped urgently, "Don't leave me here alone….help me.."

McGee turned back again and gave him another long, calculating stare. He made up his mind.

"If I was to ask you a question, do you think you could give me a yes or no answer without interrogating me?" he started.

Tony guffawed loudly, "No."

McGee turned away again and Tony grabbed his arm.

"I'm sorry", he whimpered, "ask me, ask me anything."

McGee turned back again, "And you won't quiz me or ask me anything about why I'm asking you this question?"

"Yeah, whatever, anything", Tony's eyes had a dangerous crazed look.

McGee took a deep breath, "Hypothetically", he paused uncertainly and looked at Tony who urged him with a couple of nods, "Hypothetically, if I were to get married in the next year or so, do you think you would consider being my best man?"

Tony stared at McGee in disbelief. There was a stunned silence than stretched out a full minute while Tony considered the best method of overturning the conditions of the question. McGee was still watching him intently.

"What?"

"I mean, theoretically," McGee began over, "you're the guy I spend the most time with at the moment so it seems only logical that…"

"Who is she?"

"Tony!"

"No, no , no, no," Tony admonished him, "you don't just go a dump a question like that on someone and then not tell them anything."

"Tony, you promised."

"Well, I'm unpromising, who is she?"

"You haven't answered my question", McGee reminded him.

"What question?" Tony thought back hard, "Oh that! Oh, yeah, of course. Anything for you buddy." He slapped McGee on the shoulder hoping he could get on his good side. "And if I ever get married, I want you right there at the front door of the church: handing out the order of ceremony."

McGee snorted gently. He hadn't expected anything less, or more of Tony.

"So who is she?" Tony persisted.

"Not telling you", said McGee smugly.

"Why not?" Tony challenged, "Got a 'good personality' has she?"

McGee raised an eyebrow at him, "No", he denied, "I think you'd find her very attractive."

"Ah!" said Tony victoriously, "So you think I'm a threat."

McGee laughed spontaneously, causing Tony to frown at him, "No I don't think you're a threat, Tony."

"Well, why won't you tell me?" Tony pouted.

"Because I haven't asked her yet and she might say no". McGee shut his mouth tightly. He hadn't meant that bit to come out.

Tony was grinning wildly. "Ahhh", he concluded, "and tonight is the night".

McGee looked away guiltily.

"How long have you had the booking", Tony probed, an amused tone in his voice.

"Two months", McGee admitted sheepishly, a small smile playing on his lips.

"And how many times have you cancelled and re-booked?"

McGee looked up sharply in surprise then gave a shy, guilty smile, "twice" he said finally.

"Wooo, it is serious", Tony teased. "So where are you going?"

"Nowhere you'd go, Tony."

"That was a given, Probie", said Tony flatly, "I don't propose to women in internet cafes."

"No, it's somewhere special to her", McGee explained quietly.

"Good move, Probie", Tony congratulated him; "your personality is already begin sucked away." Then he considered, "Not that that's a bad thing, of course."

McGee glared at him.

"What time are you picking her up?" Tony began again.

"We're meeting there; she has to work a little late tonight."

"So do I know her?"

"No questions, Tony", McGee reminded him.

"So I've met her somewhere!" Tony concluded. The surprised look on McGee's face told him he had hit the mark. Sometimes his powers of interrogation surprised even him.

"Not at work", Tony thought out loud, "I could pick that a mile away…Navy, she's in the Navy" he looked across at McGee to judge how hot or cold he was: very hot by the look of it. "Hmmm, a computer geek in the Navy, that shouldn't be too hard to pin down".

"J-J-J-Just stop, Tony", McGee seemed to be panicking; he had the stammer, tripled eye-blink and the lip licking things going almost simultaneously.

"Relax", Tony soothed him, "Just one little name and I'll be off your back"

"What if she says 'no' and then you meet her one day", McGee challenged.

Tony grinned at the prospect, causing McGee to utter an exasperated sigh.

"I'll tell you her name tomorrow, if she says yes, OK?" McGee finally relented.

"OK", Tony agreed.

"There he is now," said McGee opening the car door.

"He?" said Tony in surprise, "I didn't know you swung that way, Probie. Not that there's anything wrong with that."

McGee froze with the door half open and turned just his head to glare at Tony, "Blake", he said sternly, "Ziva's contact."

"Oh", Tony's head snapped back to Ziva who was by now talking to said man, "Let's go Probie, what are you waiting for?"

* * *

The two agents strolled casually across the road keeping Ziva and her contact in distant sight. They quickened their pace when Ziva rounded the corner of a greenhouse which evolved into an all out sprint at the sound of a gunshot. Tony went to the left around the greenhouse as McGee sprinted off to the right.

In moments Tony was by Ziva's side. She was sitting on the ground, cursing in some guttural language and digging a tourniquet out of her purse. Blood was running freely from a bullet wound in her leg.

"You OK", asked Tony, gun still in his hand, his eyes scanning the trees.

"Yes", she growled, "he took me by surprise" she bandaged up her own leg and flipped out her cell phone to call 911.

"Did you suck the bullet out yourself?" Tony asked.

She regarded him levelly, "Don't be ridiculous, that would contaminant forensic evidence".

Toy hovered around her for a moment, "you don't really need me here for anything, do you?"

"No", said Ziva holding the phone to her ear. She lowered the phone as two shots rang out, "Go, Tony" she urged.

Tony grinned, "Two shots, McGee", he muttered admiringly, "Not bad".

* * *

Tony rounded the corner of the greenhouse and was surprised to see only a prone body. There was no McGee hanging over it with gun trained. Then there was the horrifying realization that McGee was the body and he ran forward.

Tony grabbed McGee's shoulder and turned him to his side, carefully. There was a dark crimson stain across half his shirt. Tony closed his eyes for a moment and swallowed hard. Tentatively, he felt for a pulse. He let out a relieved sigh: it was there. It was weak, but it was there. The breathing was shallow, but then he'd probably just lost a lung, it was the best he could hope for.

Tony started stripping off his jacket but a strange bulge in McGee's jacket pocket caught his eye. He drew it out slowly and was not at all surprised at what he found. It was a small ring box. He held it up to the light. There was a bullet hole right through the center. He pocketed the box and went about trying to stem the flow of blood.

"Should have told me her name, Probie", he chastised McGee as he heard an ambulance pull up.

As they carted McGee away, Tony suddenly ran after them, "Hold up", he called. He drew up to McGee and frantically searched for his cell phone.

"Her name, Probie", he said in frustration as he extracted the phone. "Why wouldn't you give me her name?"

"Might have something to do with being unconscious", the ambulance guy suggested sarcastically as he hoisted the trolley into the back of the ambulance.

Tony shot him a withering look as they rolled McGee into the back of the ambulance to join Ziva who was sitting up looking particularly pissed off.


	2. Lab time

Tony raced into Abby's lab with McGee's cell phone in his hand, "Abbs, I need you to get a record of McGee's calls."

Abby looked up at him from her computer, "Does McGee know you have his cell?" she inquired casually.

"No", Tony panted handing it over, "He doesn't need it right now."

"Tony!" Abby stared at him, "where is McGee?"

"Surgery", said Tony distractedly, "Comon, Abby, this is important."

Abby continued staring; there must be something she had missed. "Surgery?" she queried.

"Yeah, yeah, he got shot," Tony dismissed her, "the PHONE Abbs."

"Tony!"

"What!"

"Is he OK?"

"Who?"

"McGee; the guy who got shot and whose cell phone you want me to hack."

"Oh, yeah, I think so."

"So is Ziva with him?"

"Yeah, well, no, not really, she's probably in surgery too."

"Oh my God, Tony!" Abby flung her arms around his neck and squeezed hard enough to cut of his air supply, "you're in shock, or denial or something. Maybe its survivor's guilt."

Tony gently peeled her arms away, "McGee had a big date tonight and I need to find her," he explained.

"Where's Gibbs?"

"MTAC: chewing out the director about why one of her contacts landed two of his agents in hospital."

"So Gibbs thinks that you're…"

"Hunting down the bad guy…."

"When in actuality you are.."

"Trying to find out what McGee had planned for tonight."

"OK. Cool. So why don't you just check his Datebook", she suggested.

"Great idea! Forget the cell phone; I need you to hack into McGee's computer"

"There's no hacking, Tony, it's publicly accessible. Let's check his calendar. He doesn't protect most of his work stuff," said Abby cheerfully, "Just check his Datebook" She clicked on an icon on the desktop. "See!"

"What is he doing tonight?" Tony peered at the screen over her shoulder.

"Ahhh, something at 19:30", said Abby uncertainly squinting at the listing.

"What do you mean something?"

"It's a private entry, it's password protected", Abby explained.

"Well, can you hack into it?"

Abby laughed at him, "No" she said definitively.

"Why not?"

"Because it's McGee and he has set up a password specifically to guard this entry from people like you or me."

"Can we get Ducky to profile him and just pop out a magic password?"

"I repeat, 'its McGee'", Abby emphasized, "Its going to be a minimum of 10 characters long, mixed case alpha numeric with special characters. The room full of monkeys with the typewriters would be onto their third novel by the time they hit on McGee's password."

Tony gave an exasperated sigh and ran his hand through his hair. "OK, so we've at least got a time", he consoled himself, "so what sort of places would McGee take someone to dinner".

"You're planning to hit on his dinner date while he's in surgery? That's low, Tony?" even Abby was shocked.

"No!" he was indignant, "I want to tell her he's not coming."

"I think she'll kind of figure that out", Abby pointed out.

"No, you don't understand, it was like an important dinner."

"Whoa", Abby interest was piqued, "how important?"

Tony looked at her for a moment and then withdrew the ring box from his pocket and showed it to her.

"No way!" Abby screamed.

"Yeah", Tony confirmed, "and the chance of finding her after 48 hours diminishes to almost zero…where would he take her?"

"Who is she?"

"No idea, some Navy computer geek. I checked through the list of last numbers on his cell phone and there's only one possibility: someone called 'Sully' but it may be his drycleaner. Did he ever mention a Sully to you Abbs?"

"No", said Abby distractedly, "Why didn't he tell, me?" she pouted at Tony.

"Probably the same reason he didn't tell me", said Tony ruefully.

"OK", said Abby in a business like tone, "First let's see who this phone has called recently."

It took less than a minute for Abby to give Tony her smug smile of satisfaction, "McGee has been calling one Lieutenant Anne Sullivan, Navy geek extraordinaire."

Tony looked over at the screen where a rather severe Navy headshot was glaring at him. A twinge of recognition niggled at him, "Isn't that the five thousand dollar Gibblet morphing woman?"

"Hey yeah", Abby exclaimed, "You're right."

Tony pondered the photo thoughtfully for a moment, "You think she's a virgin?"

"Tony!" Abby punched him on the arm, "The term is 'coitully challenged'"

"You're making that up!"

"So what", she said defiantly, "All words are made up."

Tony raised an eyebrow at her.

"Coitually challenged, hmm, well I think it's a challenge McGee is willing to accept", Tony commented, "I'll give her a call".

He swore when he found the cell phone had been turned off. He left a curt message and looked at Abby for inspiration.

"When was he going to pick her up?" she tried.

"He's not, they're meeting there…."

Tony had a sudden idea. He looked at his watch, "They might have all gone home by now but I'll make a few calls to some of my more social Navy buds and see if they know this geek".

"Right", said Abby, "I'll go through the restaurants looking for some of his favourite haunts."

"Check out the chick places", said Tony suddenly, "He said it was somewhere special to her".

Tony glanced at his watch. It was going to be close. He flicked out his little black book and started phoning. It only took two phone calls for Tony to find someone who knew Lieutenant Sullivan and only one more to get onto a personal friend.

"Abbs, our Lieutenant is a sucker for little Italian restaurants", he said.

"Ohh, how very Billy Joel of her, I'm on, it", said Abby excitedly, "There are 45 Italian restaurants in the local area, I'll do a phone search for bookings under McGee."

"Give me half the list", said Tony frantically.

They compared notes 15 minutes later. "I never realised how many McGee's there were in this town", said Abby in awe. There were 5 possibilities and 10 minutes until showtime.

"Give me the list", said Tony, "I'll take them one by one".

"Ok, I'll meet you at the hospital"

* * *

Tony stopped short as he walked in the front door of the third restaurant. There was someone who looked vaguely familiar. Tie her hair up in a severe Navy bun and add some thick glasses and Bingo: singles lady. He smiled widely, McGee had got in while she was vulnerable. He was so proud of him. She looked a lot more feminine with her hair down and a flattering dress. McGee did have good taste after all.

"Lieutenant Anne Sullivan?" Tony started flipping out his badge.

"Yes?" she looked hesitant;

Tony slid discretely into the chair across from her, "We've been trying to reach you for a couple of hours," he started.

"What's wrong? Tell me Tim didn't send you to break up with me."

"No! No, no, no, no!", Tony held up his hands in surrender, "he's in hospital. He took a bullet this afternoon."

Her eyes opened wide in fear.

"He'll be fine", he assured her, paraphrasing what Abby had actually said when she had called from the hospital, "but he might not be able to make dinner."

She nodded tearfully and rose, "Let's go".


	3. Driving Miss Sullivan

If there was one thing Tony DiNozzo hated more than begin stuck in a car with a crying woman, it was being stuck in a car with someone else's crying woman. There was not even the promise of consolation sex. She had managed to attain some frequency that made his teeth resonate, an experience he had only once suffered at the experienced hands of his math teacher, Mrs Powers. He considered spinning the wheel and crashing the car into the next oncoming vehicle, and then dismissed it as a tad too rash. He knew there was only one thing to do, and has much as he hated to do it, it was his only way out.

"So how did you two meet?"

The sobbing stopped almost instantaneously. Now the problem was listening to the answer.

"Well, it was after I was kidnapped and some nice NCIS woman had taken my statement and the ambulance people were finishing up and he came over."

Tony was impressed, McGee had become quite the little protégée: woman in a vulnerable position, go in for the kill. Crime scenes were much better than funerals; you didn't even have to go out of your way.

"He asked me how effective I had found the Virginia Singles dating service, apart from the kidnappers," she looked up at Tony, "I thought he was joking at first but he looked really serious. He said that Virginia Singles had an 85 percent marriage rate and I said that the other 15 percent were complete psychos and he pointed out the two weren't mutually exclusive and psychos can make very devoted husbands."

She turned to look out the window. "That made me laugh. After all I had just been through, he made me laugh. Then I looked at him again and I tried to imagine what his kids would look like and…"

"Whoa!" Tony interjected, "Too much information."

She paused and smiled at him, "So then they said I could go home and I realised I didn't have transportation with me and he offered me a ride home."

"What did he say when he saw your apartment?" Tony remembered the 'one floor plan fits all nerds' layout from his search with Ziva.

"Ha!" she laughed and sniffed a little simultaneously, "When we were outside the door he was giving me some speech about how a cleanup crew had been through so it wouldn't look too bad and something might seem out of place or broken but rest assured it was much better than before. Then I opened the door and said something about them being better than a housekeeper and he was just standing there in the doorway with his mouth open."

Tony laughed; he could just see the expression on McGee's face.

"Then he rushed straight into the bathroom and said, 'did yours come with the monkey curtains too?'"

She laughed at the memory, "I might have thought he was crazy or giving me some bizarre pickup line if the apartment hadn't actually come with monkey curtains in the bathroom".

"He explained his apartment looked just like mine, we compared layouts they were almost the same, except I have a couch. I still have no idea why he doesn't have a couch. Seems totally crazy to me."

She paused to blow her noise, "Then we found we read the same stuff. Did you know he writes?"

"Yeah", said Tony absently checking the cars in his rear vision mirror.

"So he stayed a while to make sure I was OK and then he asked if we could get together again sometime and I suggested the weekend because I was going to be building my new computer from scratch and I thought he might like to help."

"He would have loved that", Tony agreed.

"Yes he did, and he even brought me a little present. It was a DVD, all wrapped up in a little box and everything."

"What was it?"

"The backup from the hard disk of my old computer, he'd saved everything. It was so sweet." she smiled wistfully at the memory and Tony had to swallow to keep the bile from rising in his throat.

As much as Tony didn't want to hear about the courting rituals of the suburban geek, he was pragmatic enough to realise that if he ever wanted to bed a geek, the information she was now supplying would be invaluable.

"So that's how it all started," he concluded, hoping she would take the hint and stop talking.

"Yes, we spent a magical day together rebuilding the box. We had this romantic little lunch then we went for a walk and we talked about our future. Then when we got back, he showed me he'd brought a photo of himself to put into my MorphPro program so we could check out what our kids would look like."

At this point a little voice in Tony's head started saying 'blah, blah, blah' to drown out her voice. He really didn't want to hear about two geeks designing their offspring. The phrase "soul mate" managed to break through his defences, but in the main, they held tight until the hospital started appearing on the horizon. He gripped the wheel tightly and focused his energies on the building of salvation.


	4. A proposal

Abby was sitting beside McGee's bed when they arrived, holding his hand and silently watching over him at close range. Very close range; her face only was only six inches from his and she was peering at him intently as though she was trying to read his mind. Ziva was sitting in a chair engrossed in a magazine with her bandaged leg propped up on a third chair positioned in front of her and a pair of crutches leaning against the wall behind her.

"Hey Tony", said Abby quietly as they entered without shifting her gaze.

"Hey Abbs", Tony replied, matching the volume, "How's he going?"

"OK, they say", she looked up at him and noticed he had company, "Oh hi", she said without enthusiasm, "You must be McGee's woman: 'Spanish Rose' lady"

Ziva looked up suddenly from her reading to scrutinize the woman. She certainly looked better than the last time she had seen her. Not being kidnapped seemed to agree with her.

"Don't you start", Lieutenant Sullivan crossed her arms determinedly, "Tim's already given me an earful over that password".

"Well, it was cracked by a two-hundred year old M.E. with the ink still wet on his profiling masters." Abby pointed out.

"Yeah, but it kept you two up all night, didn't it?", Lieutenant Sullivan shot back, "I bet you were looking for a 10 character, mixed case, alpha numeric with special characters, weren't you?"

"Well, yeah", Abby thought that much must be obvious.

"Well, who do you think I was trying to protect it from?"

Abby eyed her suspiciously, and then decided to drop it.

Lieutenant Sullivan stared down at the frail body on the bed in front of her. He was heavily bandaged down one side and there seemed to be all manner of tubes radiating from his body at different points. His face was pale and drawn. She could hardly believe this was the same tall, strong man she had been spending so much time with recently. He looked like he was knocking at death's door with a personalised invitation. Tears welled up in her eyes.

Ziva spoke up quickly, "So how.."

Tony's eyes opened wide in horror and he shook his head frantically at her. Ziva had obviously gone to the same 'distract the crying woman' classes he had. If he had to listen to one more moment of geek courting, someone was going to die. And it wasn't going to be pretty.

"..was your trip over?" Ziva finished slowly giving Tony a confused look.

Tony closed his eyes in relief and then caught Ziva's expression. He rolled his eyes at her meaningfully and saw a smirk play across Ziva's lips.

Lieutenant Sullivan sniffed and dug out a soggy white mass from her purse which had obviously been a tissue in happier times. "Oh, he kept me distracted recounting how Tim and I met.." her voice cracked a little and Tony and Ziva steeled themselves for the onslaught.

As if on cue, McGee took a deep breath and his eyelids fluttered open. He blinked slowly at the image before him, decomposing Abby's face into its vector components in his mind and pattern matching across his internal databank.

"Hey Abbs", he said quietly.

"Hey McGee, how're you feeling?"

"Sore", he admitted groggily, "What happened?"

"Ziva's contact shot you," came Tony's voice from the other side of the bed.

McGee continued staring at Abby in confusion, "You sound just like Tony. I didn't even see your lips move".

Abby shook her head in amusement, "You're really not quite with us yet are you?" she patted his hand.

He frowned at her, "What day is it?" he asked.

"Friday", said Abby gently, "Friday night."

McGee's eyes opened wide, "Friday night", he gasped, "I've got to go!"

He struggled to sit up in the bed but fell back with a yelp as an agonising pain shot through his chest. He grimaced in pain for a moment, panting heavily.

"Abby", he said urgently through gritted teeth, "You've got to do me a favour…".

"Already taken care of.." this time McGee turned at the voice and saw her standing there.

"Oh, thank God", he breathed, "I didn't want you to think I'd stood you up."

"No, Tony tracked me down".

McGee gave Tony a puzzled look, "but how did you find her, I didn't tell you anything?"

"A good investigator doesn't need much to go on", Tony lectured him.

"Well, Tony, I must say I am impressed", McGee smiled tiredly at him.

"Well, girls", said Tony sending Abby a knowing glance, while offering his arm to Ziva so that she could lever herself out of the chair "We might want to leave these two alone."

Abby seemed reluctant to leave, lingering next to McGee's side as Tony gathered Ziva's crutches and passed them to her.

"Coming?" he prompted Abby again as Ziva hobbled towards the door.

"OK", she relented quietly and Tony put a friendly arm around her shoulder with the express purpose of guiding her out the door. Once he had her out, Tony shut the door firmly and ducked back to McGee's bedside.

"We'll be right outside", he said, "If you need to tell us anything".

As he spoke, Tony slid his hand under McGee's sheets. McGee looked up at him questioningly as he felt Tony's arm bumped along his own, but Tony only smiled. Then he felt Tony nudge his hand a couple of times with something hard and he took the hint and grabbed the item. It was a small box. Tony removed his hand quickly and watched McGee's face until he saw recognition wash over it.

"Thanks Tony", he said quietly.

As Tony left, McGee turned to the beautiful woman at his bedside. "I was, ah meaning to ask you something tonight," he started.

"I thought you might be", she smiled and pulled up a chair next to him.

He smiled at her, this was so much easier than he thought, except that he felt like crap and his eyes were threatening to crash down any second, "Would you, ah, consider, marrying me?"

"Of course", she smiled back.

McGee slid the small box out from under the bed and then froze. There was a gunshot hole through the center. "What the…"

But Lieutenant Sullivan just took it from him and opened it. "It's beautiful", she smiled, carefully extracting the partially mangled ring and wriggling it on her finger.

"Ah, that's not what it used to look like," he started.

"I like it", she laughed, "It's a one off! Besides, it reminds me of you."

"What, warped?"

"No, your job, what you do, how we met, all those things".

"I'm glad", he breathed and his eyes slid shut.


	5. You can't always get what you want

Tony, Ziva and Abby walked into Abby's lab to find McGee slumped on the bench fast asleep, head resting on folded arms. Tony pouted for a moment and then a grin spread over his face as he crept up behind him

"McGee", he whispered in a high pitched imitation of Abby's voice, "My computers french fried."

There was no response.

"Stand aside, DiNozzo", said Abby pushing him roughly out of the way. She leant down close to McGee's ear and whispered, "What do you think of the pink, Timothy?"

"Fine!" McGee bolted upright, "Any colour, whatever you like".

"Move with the times, DiNozzo", Abby laughed as they high-fived over McGee's head.

"What?" McGee was looking around in confusion.

Tony patted McGee on the arm, "Hard night, Buddy?"

"You have no idea", McGee groaned rolling his shoulders, "Getting married is like one of those Sci Fi shows: in order to get to the where you want to go you have pass through a black hole and suffer tortuous pain."

"How did 'meet the parents' go?" asked Abby pushing him off the stool with her hip to access the keyboard he had been sleeping over.

"Fine", he mumbled, stumbling to an adjacent stool, "They didn't really care who she brought home as long as I was breathing. Even then…I got the impression they never thought she would get married."

"Yep", sighed Tony sarcastically, "You're getting a real catch."

McGee frowned at him and heaved a great sigh, "You know what?" he said in a resigned tone, "It's fine. It will all be over soon and we'll be married and I never have to pick the difference between shades of pink again". He gave them a wane smile.

"You need a night off", Ziva summarised.

"I can't", he shook his head sadly: there isn't one scheduled in on the time line.

He straightened slightly as Abby rose from her stool and began to massage his shoulders and neck sympathetically from behind.

"Take her somewhere nice, somewhere romantic," Ziva suggested, "Make it a surprise; tell her she has been working so hard on the wedding preparations that you wanted to do something nice for her."

"Why would she possibly agree to that? Wedding planning is her life."

Ziva huffed at him, "You gentiles, just don't understand the power of guilt".

"What?"

"You're not saying 'I don't want to do wedding planning', you're saying 'here's a nice romantic gesture that I'm doing for you': Guilt her into it."

"You are truly evil, Officer David", Tony complemented her.

"Thank you, it's more of an art than a science".

McGee rubbed his forehead wearily, "I'll give it a try".

"Good", said Ziva firmly, "If there is nothing for us, we will come back later."

She spun on her bad leg and it gave out slightly. Tony grabbed her arm to stabilize her as she fell. She shot him a look of exasperation and then smiled begrudgingly at him.

"You're too proud, Officer David", he chastised her as he let go.

"Who would have thought you chivalrous?" she smiled slyly at him and headed for the door. Tony raised a suspicious eyebrow and followed her out.

Abby gave McGee a kiss on the back of his head and a small squeeze around his shoulders. "You sure you really want to do this?" she whispered sadly in his ear.

"Yeah", he said softly, "I really do."

"Ok then", she closed her eyes and leaned into the back of his head for a moment, taking a deep stuttering breath and drinking in his scent.

He turned to look at her and saw moisture in her eyes. He rose from his stool and enveloped her in a warm hug. "Oh, Abbs, come here" he invited.

"It's OK", she said sadly, her voice muffled, "I just feel like my sand pit buddy is going off to big school. Before you know it you'll be having kids."

"Oh, no", he assured her looking at the date on his watch over her shoulder; "They aren't scheduled for 2 years and six months."

Her tone hardened, "Keep talking McGee, you're making it easier."

He bent down to peer into her eyes, "We'll always be Team McGee at work."

She narrowed her eyes, "Team Scuito: I'm the brains, you're the brawn."

"You're the brains? Maybe the whacky team mascot…"

"Hey!" they sprung apart at the sound of Gibbs voice from the door, "Do you know what Lieutenant Sullivan would do to you if she caught you two-timing with Abby?"

"Ah Boss", McGee stammered, "we weren't, there was nothing…"

"Get your gear together", said Gibbs shortly, "You're doing a stake out tonight with DiNozzo."

"Ah... fine OK", he shot Abby a guilty look and left hurriedly.

When he was out of sight, Gibbs turned to Abby.

"That was a bit mean," she said.

"What?", said Gibbs with deigned innocence, "I gave him the night off didn't I?"

"At a stake out?"

"Believe me, it will feel like a night off", he smiled.

Then he turned his attention to Abby. "You OK?" he asked in his kind, gruff voice.

"No", she said sullenly accepting his hug, "but I will be".

Gibbs kissed her on the top of her head.

* * *

McGee trudged wearily up the two flights of stairs lugging his second load of equipment. It was the first night he had spent without his fiancée since he'd got out of hospital but he was too exhausted to enjoy the freedom. All he wanted was to lie down and sleep for a week.

When he reached the right door, he turned backwards and reversed into the room using his back to push the door open. He spun and saw Tony on his knees constructing a camera on a stand.

"Just drop that anywhere", said Tony distractedly.

McGee released his grip and the entire pile tumbled haphazardly to the ground with a resounding metal on metal grind. Tony stopped his work and looked up at him in surprise, "I didn't mean that literally, Probie".

McGee shrugged uncaringly, "Sorry".

McGee stretched his back with a groan and his eyes scanned the room. They came to rest on the single bed against the wall. It beckoned invitingly and he floated across to it as if drawn by some hypnotic chant. He was vaguely aware of Tony muttering to himself as he dropped one of the fiddly screws from the tripod yet again but his attention was almost entirely focused on the enticing idea of lying down. Slowly, he crawled onto the bed and stretched out full length. It was way too short but he really didn't care. He felt the mattress's warm embrace and he sunk into its contours gratefully.

"You could set up the computer on the desk, Probie," Tony suggested when he could hear no industrious noises from his companion. He swore as the tiny screw evaded him yet again and sat back on his heels trying to search for it on the floor. He was struck suddenly by the silence in the room.

"Probie?"

He looked around to see McGee face down on the mattress.

"Probie!" he tried again.

He stalked over to the bed. From close range he could hear McGee's steady breathing.

"Mc.." his cell phone went off. The caller ID told him it was Gibbs. Perfect.

"Hey Boss", he started.

"You ready yet?" came the curt response.

"No," Tony retorted, "but it would be faster if Probie wasn't SLEEPING", he enunciated clearly aiming his words at McGee.

There was a chuckle on the other end of the line. "Oh let him sleep, DiNozzo, it's probably the first chance he's had in months."

"But Boss," Tony whined, "I'm the senior field agent, I get to sleep first."

"Are you tired?" Gibbs quizzed him.

"Well, no but…" Tony petered out.

"Don't make me come down there, DiNozzo", Gibbs warned.

"OK", Gibbs could feel the pout from the other side of town.

"Call me when you're done setting up."

"Right boss".

Tony hung up and sulked. He looked down at McGee sleeping peacefully and tried to work out the best place to kick him.


	6. You get what you need

Tony peered out the door of the small ante-room at the church surveying the well groomed masses congregating in the main hall of the church. He recognised only a handful of people. He smiled when he saw Ziva frisking everyone at the door. As most were military people, they didn't seem to mind too much. Anyone who left was either a terrorists or from the bride's side; either way, he didn't need to see them.

Abby was dressed in mourning: full black complete with hat and veil. Arriving in her hearse was a nice touch but it did confuse others who arrived at the church and thought they had the wrong place.

"I don't think I can go through with this, Tony", McGee whined pitifully from behind him.

Tony looked around to see McGee, grey and sweating, peridoically hyperventilating into a brown paper bag.

"You'll be fine", Tony assured him striding over and taking the seat next to him.

McGee did not look convinced. Tony gave him an encouraging smile and patted him on the back. McGee went back to breathing into his bag.

"She'll be here in about 10 minutes, and then you can get this all under your belt."

McGee whimpered in fear and Tony swore he actually turned another 10 shades of pale lighter. Tony smiled, the last time McGee looked like this; he had been staring at a body in a barrel of acid.

A knock at the door made them both look up and Tony rose to answer it. Opening the door a crack, he caught a shock of red lipstick behind a black veil. It was Abby.

"How's he doing?" she whispered.

"As expected", Tony replied.

"That bad huh?" Abby smiled a little, "Just let him know that the bride has arrived a little early and is going round the block to give everyone time to get into the church.

"Thanks, Abbs", Tony shut the door quietly.

He turned to McGee who had abandoned his security bag and was staring at him intently. "She's not coming, is she?" he panicked.

"She's here already", said Tony in an attempt to assured him.

"Arhhhh!" McGee grabbed the bag again and starting breathing hard.

Tony rolled his eyes and headed back over, "She's going round the block to give people time to get in," he explained ripping the bag from his hand. "Meanwhile, we had better get you organised, you look like crap. You really don't want that face on your wedding photos".

McGee looked up at Tony almost tearfully "What if I pass out at the alter?" he fretted as Tony led him to a small bathroom.

Tony studied McGee's ice-pale features and thought that was a distinct possibility, "That's not going to happen" he said with a conviction that he really didn't feel.

Breathing raggedly, McGee grasped the bowl in the bathroom with both hands and let his head drop. There were pins and needles running the length of his entire body and shimmery silver spots floating before his eyes. Suddenly, his supporting arms gave out and he plummeted lifelessly to the ground with a soft groan. Tony's reflexes were quick enough to deflect him so that he didn't crack his head on the basin on the way down but not quick enough to prevent a bone -jarring landing on the hard tiles of the bathroom floor.

"Dammit", Tony swore.

He knelt down and rolled McGee onto his side.

"Common Buddy", he tapped his face, "It's your big day."

McGee roused a little and his eyes opened blearily. Some colour started returning to his lips and he actually looked better than he'd looked all day.

"What happened?" he rasped.

"You flaked out on your wedding day", Tony informed him.

McGee closed his eyes and groaned, "I'm never going to get through this, am I?"

"Sure you are, that's my job," Tony assured him, "Common let's get you up".

"I think you're supposed to lie still for about 15 minutes.." McGee began reciting.

"We haven't got 15 minutes, Probie", said Tony urgently hoisting him up under his arms.

McGee rested his hands on the basin again. He actually felt a lot better than before. If he had known how much better he would feel, he would have passed out hours ago. It's not as if it hadn't been an option.

"You do realise that if you fail to show, tradition dictates that your BEST MAN has to marry her", Tony pointed out.

McGee looked up at Tony's grinning reflection in the mirror, stunned. Then a small smile flitted across his lips. Tony always knew just what to say. He took a deep breath and straightened.

"Let's do this", he said determinedly.

Tony slapped him on the back and opened up the small toiletries bag he had packed for the occasion. "Right, teeth, hair.." he commanded.

* * *

McGee had wondered why his bride-to-be was so insistent on having both a professional photographer and a professional video recorder. Now it was obvious. He was standing outside the church overcome by an overwhelming sense of relief and he had no memory of what had just happened. There was a throng of people milling around congratulating him. Anne was by his side and she looked like he felt. He was sure there was a name for it: wedding amnesia? They were now husband and wife but their bond was more that of strangers who had just endured some horrific tragedy.

Tony had been an unmitigated success as a best man. There was no way he could have gone through this with anyone else. He didn't quite know how to thank him but he'd find away.

The after wedding conveyor belt seemed to be on over-drive. Gibbs was shaking his hand, now Ducky. Tony gave him the two handed shake encompassing his hands. Ziva grasped both his arms for support and popped up on her toes to congratulate him but Tony suddenly grabbed her around the waist and lifted her up to the required height. She gave McGee a chaste kiss on the lips and then smiled playfully at Tony as he dropped her down again.

Then there was Abby, resplendent in full mourning attire. They stared silently at each other for a moment and he could see her eyes moisten again. He smiled gently at her and was totally unprepared when she grabbed him forcefully and attempted to suction out his tonsils before Tony, Ziva and Gibbs managed to tear her away. He stood wide eyed and panting with his new wife staring daggers at Abby.

The crowd was thinning out and heading for the reception. He took his new wife's hand and whispered, "Let's make a break for it", in her ear.

She smiled, nodded and led him quickly to the awaiting car.

McGee looked casually out the window as they drove away. Abby still looked inconsolable. Just as well she had Gibbs and Tony…hold on, he did a double take, Tony was standing behind Ziva with his arms wrapped around her waist. He craned his neck to confirm what he saw but the car drove out of range.

Abby sniffed as the car disappeared from view. She knew this hiccup in life would smooth over soon. Sadly she headed for her hearse and was startled to find a tall man with gel spiked hair, covered in tattoos, chains and safety pins checking it out.

"This yours?" he asked.

"Yeah"

"Cool"

She moved around the car to size him up, "Hmm, Punk: very retro", she said admiringly.

"Give me a lift to the reception?"

"Sure."

She unlocked the door, "So what do you do for a living Mr Punk man?"

"I have a PhD in theoretical mathematics", he started.

She paused and looked up at him, "So what, you're unemployed then."

"Pretty much", he admitted.

"Cool", she said, "let's go"


End file.
